Once upon a time I remember the day when I couldn't write if I was happy. It was truly a ventilation for my soul. Now I speak my mind freely, a little too much so. That in this sense alone I appear to be angry; this anger has eaten me away. It drives me to do and say the insane. I never tried to pent up happiness and this task proves harder than it seems. Even though things are starting to mellow out.
Time changes and people evolve, I too have succumb to evolution. Only it takes times for a person to grow. I no longer see changes around me before I see change in myself first. Now I realize that the world has not changed, life has always been moving forward. It was I who was stuck in a stage of disbelief.
Still I have yet to grow out of my shell. Even more so when a new stage begins. I cannot see what is coming, but I believe that it is for the best. Right now I'm in a state confusion. Just waiting for myself to clean up my own mess. Slowly it dissapears as time erodes and heals all wounds. I find myself finally standing, looking up at the long way to go. For the first time I'm actually planing, and simulating all I already know. It's time to face a new challenge, with hopes of conquering anything that will come before (success) it's time I reach up and show just how much I've grown.
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Sorry love, truth hurts; your an adiction that I abused
I'm sorry I can't fall in love
I'm sorry I can't give you my heart
I'm sorry I couldn't try
To make it worth your while
I'm weak I can't hold my tongue
I can't hold back telling you my truth
I never even considered loosing you,
I don't know what it means,
Because I never let you too close,
Even when I surpassed all my expected boundaries , and fell into something new,
Not quite love, but an addiction that I abused,
So close and yet so far from the truth,
A vision envisioned subconscious surrender to the truth
A lie an act that I can't complete
A person arises with whom I can't compete.
I'm sorry I can't give you my heart
I'm sorry I couldn't try
To make it worth your while
I'm weak I can't hold my tongue
I can't hold back telling you my truth
I never even considered loosing you,
I don't know what it means,
Because I never let you too close,
Even when I surpassed all my expected boundaries , and fell into something new,
Not quite love, but an addiction that I abused,
So close and yet so far from the truth,
A vision envisioned subconscious surrender to the truth
A lie an act that I can't complete
A person arises with whom I can't compete.
Sunday, May 22, 2011
Subtitles Script
[SAGER] Ahmed we would like to talk about classic cars in Kuwait.
To start off could you tell me their current situation in Kuwait.
[AHMED] Honestly the situation is excellent and more each day they pop up and people restore and modify them. I mean Mashallah Kuwait sets the standard in classic cars among the Gulf countries.
---
[SAGER] Okay Ahmed are you facing any problems with finding spare parts?
[AHMED] I don't face many problems, I can get parts from America, ask friends, bring about here and there. We find it, our friends get things done.
[SAGER] Right on them.
---
[SAGER] I remember the last time we spoke you told me the best solution for Kuwait is if there was a large parts store.
[AHMED] That's right, we spoke about that. But this needs capital, who can provide that? If there was a large warehouse like Summit, or Jeggs, or any of the big companies, this solves a lot of problems.
[SAGER] Yet it needs capital.
[AHMED] Capital yes, so work gets done fast. In this case many of the people's car problems are solved. Work becomes pleasant.
[SAGER] Right, especially if someone knows what parts to order.
[AHMED] Yes you order parts from the big American companies, they have and deliver everything. Alhamdulillah work is good and sport cars are increasing, because there are people who care and work on them.
---
[AHMED] [something something] and soft music. These are the way things should get done, I mean someone shoots a video and spectates along with soft music. Look at that guy.
[THAT GUY] Doctor hit it!
[SAGER] Ya that's a radio station or none at all.
[AHMED] These are the days, an old radio playing an old song. What do you think?
[SAGER] Monster.
---
[AHMED] Love the classics.
[SAGER] Of course, how can't we.
[AHMED] Unfortunately it's not clear. Hah!
---
[SAGER] Alright you think Kuwait allows someone to drive a car like this everyday?
[AHMED] Yes [something] air-conditioning, everything is allowable.
---
[AHMED] Here are our racers, ranking first in the Gulf.
[SAGER] First in the Gulf?
[AHMED] All the time.
[SAGER] True our friends don't let us down.
[AHMED] It's something honorable honestly.
[SAGER] And what about our situation in Bahrain and the UAE?
[AHMED] In Bahrain we're the first all the time, they're afraid of us. Our friends Mashallah are villains!
[SAGER] Right on them.
[AHMED] Always the first, they fear the evil in them. Come on.
This is our garage, and this is where we chill, our chats and our talks.
Alhamdulillah they like our work. We have no problems.
To start off could you tell me their current situation in Kuwait.
[AHMED] Honestly the situation is excellent and more each day they pop up and people restore and modify them. I mean Mashallah Kuwait sets the standard in classic cars among the Gulf countries.
---
[SAGER] Okay Ahmed are you facing any problems with finding spare parts?
[AHMED] I don't face many problems, I can get parts from America, ask friends, bring about here and there. We find it, our friends get things done.
[SAGER] Right on them.
---
[SAGER] I remember the last time we spoke you told me the best solution for Kuwait is if there was a large parts store.
[AHMED] That's right, we spoke about that. But this needs capital, who can provide that? If there was a large warehouse like Summit, or Jeggs, or any of the big companies, this solves a lot of problems.
[SAGER] Yet it needs capital.
[AHMED] Capital yes, so work gets done fast. In this case many of the people's car problems are solved. Work becomes pleasant.
[SAGER] Right, especially if someone knows what parts to order.
[AHMED] Yes you order parts from the big American companies, they have and deliver everything. Alhamdulillah work is good and sport cars are increasing, because there are people who care and work on them.
---
[AHMED] [something something] and soft music. These are the way things should get done, I mean someone shoots a video and spectates along with soft music. Look at that guy.
[THAT GUY] Doctor hit it!
[SAGER] Ya that's a radio station or none at all.
[AHMED] These are the days, an old radio playing an old song. What do you think?
[SAGER] Monster.
---
[AHMED] Love the classics.
[SAGER] Of course, how can't we.
[AHMED] Unfortunately it's not clear. Hah!
---
[SAGER] Alright you think Kuwait allows someone to drive a car like this everyday?
[AHMED] Yes [something] air-conditioning, everything is allowable.
---
[AHMED] Here are our racers, ranking first in the Gulf.
[SAGER] First in the Gulf?
[AHMED] All the time.
[SAGER] True our friends don't let us down.
[AHMED] It's something honorable honestly.
[SAGER] And what about our situation in Bahrain and the UAE?
[AHMED] In Bahrain we're the first all the time, they're afraid of us. Our friends Mashallah are villains!
[SAGER] Right on them.
[AHMED] Always the first, they fear the evil in them. Come on.
This is our garage, and this is where we chill, our chats and our talks.
Alhamdulillah they like our work. We have no problems.
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Just a story
Life as we know it is a test. We truly enjoy the benefits only after enduring its suffering. Imagine if you will toiling over a field of food, not because nothing outside existed, but to literally taste the effort spent. We all know any average job is mundane, and any exceptions will become so with enough repetition. So why bother? Well... to stay with my example, you can't appreciate having even a lousy job until you see the alternative: nothing. "It's better having experienced something bad, than not experiencing at all" -unknown- " because the only time your not experiencing anything, is if you were dead!"
When rising in life never forget that everything is by your side, and thank god for every opportunity. When falling down uncomfortably always remember that everything is still by your side, and just as fast as you fell you can get up again. For every bad memory there's at least two good things that come from it. One, the experience gained which lead you out of it. Two, the opportunity brought forth from it.
Life isn't always a good story, at times it will seem bad. However you must believe in the power of balance in nature. How everything has a yin and a yang. Equal parts evil and good. Life too. It is the experience of the rises and the falls. Even the times where there's seamlessly nothing at all. Of course that can't be true... Unless your dead.
Think of life as just a story. Now think, for as long as you can, in your hand you hold the pen. What would you write for yourself? Keep writing until you have a full list of everything you can imagine. Anything from what you have, to want you want. Anything that crosses your mind. Now leave it on the side, maybe let someone review it, and next time you look at it categorize every item in your list into one of three things:
1. This item is to survive. ex. food,water, sleep.
2. This item is to get by. ex. shelter, clothing, transportation, etc.
3. This item is to make me happy. ex. smoking, alcohol, drugs, etc.
Just remember that every day is a new blank page, with new possibilities; and the world won't wait, time won't stop. So take your chance when it comes. With every opportunity, taken or left aside, life changes to something better. Even, in regret, you see a glimmer of hope. When you look at the whole, life is no longer just a story, it's a picture, moving in time; only when you look at now, this moment, it is complete. No fears for the future, no memories weighing you down. Now is the only moment you can look around, judge, and then proceed. To what ever comes next in life's tests. Once you remember your in control, you write what comes next and what goes, everything that comes is your want your call.
When rising in life never forget that everything is by your side, and thank god for every opportunity. When falling down uncomfortably always remember that everything is still by your side, and just as fast as you fell you can get up again. For every bad memory there's at least two good things that come from it. One, the experience gained which lead you out of it. Two, the opportunity brought forth from it.
Life isn't always a good story, at times it will seem bad. However you must believe in the power of balance in nature. How everything has a yin and a yang. Equal parts evil and good. Life too. It is the experience of the rises and the falls. Even the times where there's seamlessly nothing at all. Of course that can't be true... Unless your dead.
Think of life as just a story. Now think, for as long as you can, in your hand you hold the pen. What would you write for yourself? Keep writing until you have a full list of everything you can imagine. Anything from what you have, to want you want. Anything that crosses your mind. Now leave it on the side, maybe let someone review it, and next time you look at it categorize every item in your list into one of three things:
1. This item is to survive. ex. food,water, sleep.
2. This item is to get by. ex. shelter, clothing, transportation, etc.
3. This item is to make me happy. ex. smoking, alcohol, drugs, etc.
Just remember that every day is a new blank page, with new possibilities; and the world won't wait, time won't stop. So take your chance when it comes. With every opportunity, taken or left aside, life changes to something better. Even, in regret, you see a glimmer of hope. When you look at the whole, life is no longer just a story, it's a picture, moving in time; only when you look at now, this moment, it is complete. No fears for the future, no memories weighing you down. Now is the only moment you can look around, judge, and then proceed. To what ever comes next in life's tests. Once you remember your in control, you write what comes next and what goes, everything that comes is your want your call.
Sunday, May 1, 2011
Left with only thin air, trouble breathing here!
I can't hold on, I can't let go,
How very weak, was never strong,
I'm free yet Withheld
Bound by what is said
Do or don't I stay awake,
Wishing the smallest difference
But making the biggest mistake,
Left with only thin air,
Trouble breathing here!
Lying still i make my stance,
A point in time present and past,
Paving the future with a cast,
Made of iron and held by concrete,
I am the driver in the kings' seat,
A throne and a crown decorates me,
Time and time again I fall and she,
She is the key that opened my door,
Shattering everything even the floor,
No crown no throne no castle to control,
Left with only thin air,
Trouble breathing here!
Once I went all in I lost it all,
I cant keep up with the show,
As The curtain draws I must go,
Was waiting for the opportunity,
The chance of changing reality,
But I stand floating in a dream,
Darkness embodies me and I can't scream,
Left with only thin air,
Trouble breathing here!
I'm losing the chance to stop,
To clime higher on top,
But you can't win them all,
Losses only show when you fall,
Pains and bruises start to appear,
Just as fast as the dream came it disappears,
Left with only thin air,
Trouble breathing here!
I can already sense,
The down falls of her presence,
Small but carefully picked ,
The shit that normally wont stick,
But alas this is reality and here is my shit,
No illusions no delusions, this is where words come true,
From my heart, from my mind, from every ounce of conscience
I can't Even wish I wasn't like this,
I can't win with a lie,
But it can satisfy,
Until I wake from guilt, from torture and pain,
Pleasure has its' cost, nothing will be simple again,
but I don't want to give in,
To my instincts deep within.
How very weak, was never strong,
I'm free yet Withheld
Bound by what is said
Do or don't I stay awake,
Wishing the smallest difference
But making the biggest mistake,
Left with only thin air,
Trouble breathing here!
Lying still i make my stance,
A point in time present and past,
Paving the future with a cast,
Made of iron and held by concrete,
I am the driver in the kings' seat,
A throne and a crown decorates me,
Time and time again I fall and she,
She is the key that opened my door,
Shattering everything even the floor,
No crown no throne no castle to control,
Left with only thin air,
Trouble breathing here!
Once I went all in I lost it all,
I cant keep up with the show,
As The curtain draws I must go,
Was waiting for the opportunity,
The chance of changing reality,
But I stand floating in a dream,
Darkness embodies me and I can't scream,
Left with only thin air,
Trouble breathing here!
I'm losing the chance to stop,
To clime higher on top,
But you can't win them all,
Losses only show when you fall,
Pains and bruises start to appear,
Just as fast as the dream came it disappears,
Left with only thin air,
Trouble breathing here!
I can already sense,
The down falls of her presence,
Small but carefully picked ,
The shit that normally wont stick,
But alas this is reality and here is my shit,
No illusions no delusions, this is where words come true,
From my heart, from my mind, from every ounce of conscience
I can't Even wish I wasn't like this,
I can't win with a lie,
But it can satisfy,
Until I wake from guilt, from torture and pain,
Pleasure has its' cost, nothing will be simple again,
but I don't want to give in,
To my instincts deep within.
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